Overheard at J. Clyde...

"It's like a food fight...except God is involved." - David C.

Rules of Birmingham Driving (#1)

When on the Interstate, you must remain in the left lane, unless passing or exiting. You are allowed to get out of the left lane if a driver behind you insists on illegally passing on the left. You may move to the middle or right lane to allow the pass, but then you must immediately return to the left lane.

In any other bar, it would have been disturbing...

I went down to J. Clyde tonight to have dinner, hang out with some friends, and have a bit more of one of the beers featured at Oktoberfest. (The Big O from Pennichuck, for the record) When I ordered my dinner, the bartender asked if I wanted a cupcake. That's not something a bartender frequently asks. One of the cooks came out with a tray of them, and I selected a chocolate one with a cherry on top. After my dinner (the kitchen staff was kind enough to substitute some Spaetzle leftover form Oktoberfest for the fries), I launched into the cupcake. I must say, it's one of the best I've ever had. It was cream filled, with a crunchy wafer-ish bit at the bottom. On the way out, I commented to the cook that it was one of the best cupcakes I've had in a long time. She shot back that I'd just made her day.

Yet another thing I like about my little corner of Birmingham. Anywhere else, I might not have trusted a bar cupcake. But J. Clyde is sort of like my 'Cheers'- and I'm pretty happy about that.

Oktoberfest returns to the Tragic City!

It's been a few years since Birmingham had a good Oktoberfest. I remember fondly the events hosted by the FDSK, which focused quite a bit on German music and food. This time around, beer took the front seat. You'd expect no less from a festival sponsored by Free The Hops. Rain was a bit of a downer in the first session (this fest was structured like a brew fest, in two sessions), but it was still great fun.

I got my first amusement before the fest even opened. I was met by my friend Joseph, who showed up in rented lederhosen one size too small. He couldn't bend over to tie his shoes, so our friend Jon had to help him out.

My neighbourhood brewery was, of course, there with some new brews. This cask was one of the highlights of the day for me. (Good People brewery has the best tap handles anywhere!)

It had been some years since I'd seen Die Mitternaechters. They'd played the Weindorf at Tuscaloosa's CityFest long ago, and allowed me the great plasure of seeing the mayor and the governor do the chicken dance together. This time around, they couldn't take the stage early in the day because of the wet conditions- so they played unamplified on the street instead. I really liked hearing them this way.

An overhead view of the fest, taken from the 21st Street overpass. The crowd is still a bit thin. Morris Avenue was a nice spot for the fest- not as big and sprawling as Sloss Furnaces, where we hold Magic City Brewfest.

Of course, it wouldn't be an Oktoberfest without women selling pretzels! She's made quite a bit of headway there, it looks like.

And finally....she may not have had the most authentic dirndl at the fest, but it was the sexiest. Stupid me shot it so you can't see her legs, which went a long way toward that sexiness. The white stockings would get any hetero male's heart pumping. Heck, her getup was sexier than my kilt. :) As I drove home, I saw her walking down a city street, looking very far away from her car or her apartment. I wanted to pull over and offer her a ride, but that would have been really creepy- considering we'd just met an hour before, in the line for the porta-johns. But it was that kind of day; people made friends easily, and total strangers came up and danced with me. I hope next year's fest is just as much fun.

That's live TV... (#1)

It's sometimes funny when someone gets their words crossed on live TV. Today, a meteorologist on a local station was trying to slip in a PSA, and the following came out:

"Take advantage of the free prostate cleaning..."

Ouch. I do not want to know the method used to clean a prostate.

It's not quite girls on sheep...

The Alabama State Fair starts this weekend. It's sure to be a chance to see a unique segment of humanity, while offering the opportunity to sample such culinary delights as roasted corn and deep-fried Twinkies. But there's one thing the organizers do NOT want you to miss. Indeed, it's been mentioned in every fair advertisement I've seen or heard. (This makes someone in broadcasting take notice. When an entity has the opportunity for multiple ads, the usual strategy is to feature different points in the different ads.) The people at the fair don't want you to leave without witnessing the spectacle of monkeys riding dogs. What could be any more all-American than spider monkeys dressed up and plopped on the back of a flea-bitten pooch?

Some of you reading this may not be near Pelham, where the fair is held- or may not have plans to go to the fair. Never fear, you will not miss this amazing attraction. All you have to do is play the video below....if you dare.



By the way...if you're wondering about the reference in the title, just follow the bouncing link...

Overheard at J. Clyde...

The cute woman next to me at the bar: "I write like a left-handed eight year old boy!"

Half-parked halfwits

I took a break from work tonight to grab dinner, and also had to grab pictures of the appalling parking I saw. Unfotunately, this sort of thing is far too common in the metro. In the following picture, we start with the three cars in the foreground. Not a single one is in a parking space- not even by one wheel. The spaces run out with the Ford minivan, fourth in line. (We'll get to that later.) Making new parking spaces because you're too lazy or stupid to walk all the way from one of the many available spaces in the lot (and there were dozens) isn't even what gets me here. What got under my skin was that these non-parking morons were blocking a major path in and out of the lot.

Now, we move on to that van. Check out how it's half-parked in the last space- and how the full size van next door is also parked. If you can't get your vehicle into a space, don't force it. Just go to a part of the lot where there are a couple of free spaces (and no morons trying to park where there are no spaces), and straddle all you want.

Remember those dozens of free spaces I mentioned? I used one of them, and had to walk a full 50 feet to the door of the restaurant. I bet the assembled drivers inside thought I was crazy, and considered sending out emergency crews with oxygen and water supplies for my marathon-like trek.

res ipsa loquitur

When you've gotta go...

This Shell has the cleanest & most graffiti-free gas station loo I've ever used- and I've been in more of them than I care to think about. (22nd & Highland.)

Always use protection...

There's a running gag about helmets at J. Clyde. They finally got a real helmet. Rachel wound up being the first staffer to wear it.

The 'Ham is here.

This is just an experimental idea- an outlet for some of the experiences I've had in Birmingham, and to pass along some of the things I've seen.

I fully intend to open this up to other people, and let them contribute, submit, or just point and laugh. If you have something you feel would be worthy of this space, please let me know.